Heaven Help Me!

Back by popular demand, I am posting the link and embeding the video of  ”Jesus The Stations of the Cross” (below). Sorry to all those who had trouble finding it due to a 404 error! All credit due to “Rooftop” for the YouTube video. Also for pre-Lent consideration, here are the readings for Ash Wednesday 2010.

Jesus the Stations of the Cross

Share on Facebook

Here’s a great article written by my thoughtful husband!

Share on Facebook

“Into this world,

this demented inn,

in which there is no room for him at all,

Christ had come uninvited…

His place is with those who do not belong,

who are rejected  by power

because they are regarded as weak…

Who are denied the status of persons,

tortured and exterminated.

With those for whom

there is no room,

Christ is present in this world.”

-Thomas Merton

Share on Facebook

I am spending today with a bunch of dead people. No, I do not work at a morgue. I am at the cemetery. Today is All Soul’s Day, and my dear husband has given me a “day off” of retreat to spend as I wish. Before leaving today, we talked about where I planned to go. I have been craving some quiet one-on-one time with my maker, and as I said to Nick, “What I really need is a swift kick in the pants!”

The difference between myself and all the people six feet under is that while their bodies are dead, their souls are still alive. For me, my body is alive, but my soul is nearly dead from a lack of prayer, a lack of grace. I’ve stubbornly been avoiding asking Him for it. Clearly, He would give it; the problem is me not wanting to fall again. I know this is where to trust in God’s infinite mercy… but as St. Paul says, “For I do not do what I would like to do, but instead I do what I hate….  For even though the desire to do good is in me, I am not able to do it.” Ever been in a rut such as this?

Despite all those wise words from persons much wiser than myself on living the spiritual life, being a busy homeschooling mom of six living children has made me somber – slightly joy-less – I’m not a bad mommy – but if only I disciplined my mind, I could be so much better – like Zelie Martin. Hence, my first stop today:  St. Joseph’s Cemetery.

Thousands of mortal remains have been laid to rest here. It is a chilly autumn day. The wind is churning; echoing its sound: “You are dust, to dust you shall return.” As I walk through the crunchy leaves, shades of goldenrod, orange, and red, I am surrounded by towering monuments and level grave markers. One overriding thought pervades my mind: This someday will be me. Death is the one inevitable thing that happens to us all.  Although we try to do many things to delay its onset, age-defying remedies such as cosmetics, diet, or lifestyle changes, even these things cannot prevent the simple truth: We are destined for death.

A healthy dose of this reality around the “mini-Triduum” of All Hallow’s Eve, All Saints’ Day, and All Souls Day can do one no harm. I am not afraid of death, per se. But I am afraid of the judgment, since I am not sure that I have made the most of every waking moment I’ve lived here on earth. This is where one has to trust in God’s mercy.

My current issue, as aforementioned, is that I am tired. It is not due to a lack of rest, or some solitude every day – my dear husband is sure to make sure I have such time everyday. I just feel tired. How much of this is reasonably due to the pressures of my vocation is undisputed. But how much as this, in spite of the pressures of my vocation, I am allowing to overwhelm me, is another story.

How many mixed feelings I have about needing to be “comfortable”, have a “life of my own outside my family”,  and generally needing “free time”. Why would I desire such things, when I clearly have everything I need to be happy and realize I am blessed beyond belief? The thought is strange to me, too. So, what I’ve decided to do, is to examine this today. To recall the many times, previous to today, I could say with absolute certainty that there is no need for my vocation to be “split”, between my self and those who need my help for their very existence, and prospering.

So, with the tombstones in the background for scenery, I am reading “Story of a Soul: The Autobiography of St. Therese of Lisieux”. What I’m finding is that this young women, who was never married, never gave birth, and was 13 years younger than I at the time of her death speaks volumes of wisdom on not only family life and concern for the poor, but living and loving others in general.

I have not progressed through the whole book yet, but will write again, after I’ve had the chance to process what I’ve read.

Share on Facebook

One may be surprised to know that it is a fairly recent practice in Catholic homes to celebrate birthdays. In our culture, birthdays seem integral to the celebration of a person’s years on earth; but let us not forget the Catholic custom of celebrating “Name Days”!

Today is the name day of one of my children, Teresa. We are remembering her patron saint, St. Teresa of Avila.  At the age of seven, St. Teresa of Avila wanted nothing more than to give her life for Christ. So, she ran away to Africa to attempt martyrdom amidst the Moors.  Some may say it is fortunate that her uncle retrieved her from this, or we wouldn’t have the volumes of writings St. Teresa gave us.

This morning the children woke up to the smell of incense wafting through the air, the icon of St. Teresa of Avila prominently displayed at the kitchen table, fresh cannolis and hand-dipped chocolate covered strawberries from the local Italian market.

We celebrate Name Days “in style” in our family, perhaps more so than birthdays. Lest this tradition be misunderstood, I found an excellent article on the practice of celebrating name days.

What this article says in a nutshell is that while it is not necessary to ignore or do away with customary birthday celebrations,  we should try to restore the meaningful celebration of the feast of the saint whose name was given to us in Baptism, “our personal patron, loving and helping us whether we observe or neglect his veneration”. As a parent, I have found that my children typically do not object to this practice – any chance to get treats! They also like it because it is unique to them. Every one in the family has a birthday every year, but the child celebrating his/her name days enjoys a day which is exclusive only to him.

And the best part about it is the celebration of Name Days doesn’t end with childhood. It continues for older children, adolescents, and adults for the rest of their lives. As timeless is the life of faith, is as eternal the celebration of our union with God. And this is truly something to celebrate.

Share on Facebook

As is tradition in our home, we celebrate our name days, just as much, if not more so, as a birthday or holiday. Special treats and/or activties are picked out by the child of honor and shared with the family. They enjoy a special day with incense burned and the icon of their patron proudly displayed on the center table. They are given special prayers and reminders of who they are named after. If they are older, we ask them to teach their siblings about the special qualities of their saint. The children learn that their patrons, although imperfect, with “warts and all” demonstrate ways of attaining their final goal in this life. Saints are real life examples, like my grandmother who prayed incessantly for me when she was alive (which is a very interesting story for another post… hopefully soon), of a way to live the “good life”.

Friday, July 31st, was the feast of St. Ignatius of Loyola. Just as we celebrate with our living children, we went to the cemetery to smile with the child we lost. I explained to my daughter that she “had to go with me” to the cemetery again, because if she were no longer living, she could be darn sure we’d be there with her on her name day.

So, we said some prayers and chatted a little while, enjoying the beautiful, sunny weather that day.

Ignatius’ grave has been nicely decorated. Thank you to all who have sent something! There are the original roses the children and I put there over a month ago, but now there are a couple vases with dehydrated flowers that still smell very pretty, a Chicago White Sox teddy bear, and some now deflated balloons which say “Happy Birthday!” and “I love you”. Thank you, thank you whoever you are – although I don’t know who sent these, I am hoping you might read my blog & thus, you’ll receive our gratitude.

Share on Facebook